Good hijacker/Bad hijacker

Due to heightened security concerns I thought I would go over this topic just in case there were any questions.

Good hijackers are lovely people and you should spend plenty of time with them.

Bad hijackers are icky, avoid them.

Here are some helpful tips.

This...

is a good hijacker, despite some odd eating habits she had never seized any building or blown up innocent civilians, do not be alarmed.

This suspicious looking character is not a serious threat, with a beer and a scanner he can be tamed within minutes.

This frightening individual is in fact a sweet and precious lil ballerina, just don't piss her off for heaven's sake!

This hijacker may nor may not have actual ill will, but he is easily foiled with a mere S****ucks coffee.

This is an actual hijacker, alarm, alarm!!

Don't sit next to him on a plane or hold his shoes for him!