Ask Lime
barefoot_mistress said...
Dear Lime:
Why does chocolate have calories, and what are you planning to do about it?
Bare,
All food has calories. We need a certain caloric intake each day to maintain energy and function. An excess of caloric consumption can be handled through corresponding exercise. For example you may swim though the pool of chocolate as you sip it. It comes up even that way. Of course, if you don't have enough chocolate o hande to swim through you can just apply it to your partner's body as part of foreplay. The ensuing energy expenditure, if done correctly should negate the caloric intake.
Lime
DaMasta said...
Dear Lime: Is there such thing as a calorie and fat free chocolate bar?
LOL @ calories are afraid of heights!! THAT was classic!
DaMasta,
See above answer to Bare. And go wash your mouth out with some high quality chocolate for even suggesting such a thing! Good Lord, next you'll be asking if carob is an acceptible substitute. I am shuddering even thinking of it. On second thought, let me go wash MY mouth out with some high quality chocolate! I need it to calm my nerves after thinking about the horror of carob.
Lime
Rio said...
Dear Lime,
If I eat too much chocolate, will I die?
Love,
Rio
Rio,
Yes, Bad dog! Bad dog! Give me all the chocolate now! This is for your own good! This hurts you more than it hurts me.
Lime
The Village Idiot said...
uhhh...note to the editor...white chocolate is not a true chocolate...doesnt it have to contain ground up cocoa bean?
VI,
Very good! I was about to note that myself in this post. White chocolate is ONLY acceptable as a garnish or a decorating embellishment such as delicate white stripes atop a decadent dark chocolate truffle....something that visually contrasts with the dark, rich brown color and which subtly offers a slight textural and taste differentiation upon the tongue.......um...er...excuse me....I need a moment to myself.
Lime
bsoholic said...
Dear Lime,
I uh, er have this uh friend who loves chocolate but it makes him break out in pimples sometimes. What should he do about it?
BS,
Scientific studies have shown there is ZERO correlation between chocolate and acne. However, you are under no compulsion to tell your friend this. In fact, I recommend you encourage your friend to expunge his or her house of all chocolate for his/her own good. Then you can split the stash with me.
Lime
barefoot_mistress said...
Dear Lime,
Uh yes, where's the chocolate? I came here for the free samples.
Bare,
Free samples? Who said anything about free samples? Do I look like Willy Wonka?? I'm just the answer lady.
Lime
snavylyn said...
I have a confession to make:
Chocolate - take it or leave it.
Snavy,
I dunno what exactly that means. Are you saying you love the stuff or that you are indifferent? If you are indifferent then crimony, woman........gimme yer chocolate now!
Lime
Dear Lime:
Why does chocolate have calories, and what are you planning to do about it?
Bare,
All food has calories. We need a certain caloric intake each day to maintain energy and function. An excess of caloric consumption can be handled through corresponding exercise. For example you may swim though the pool of chocolate as you sip it. It comes up even that way. Of course, if you don't have enough chocolate o hande to swim through you can just apply it to your partner's body as part of foreplay. The ensuing energy expenditure, if done correctly should negate the caloric intake.
Lime
DaMasta said...
Dear Lime: Is there such thing as a calorie and fat free chocolate bar?
LOL @ calories are afraid of heights!! THAT was classic!
DaMasta,
See above answer to Bare. And go wash your mouth out with some high quality chocolate for even suggesting such a thing! Good Lord, next you'll be asking if carob is an acceptible substitute. I am shuddering even thinking of it. On second thought, let me go wash MY mouth out with some high quality chocolate! I need it to calm my nerves after thinking about the horror of carob.
Lime
Rio said...
Dear Lime,
If I eat too much chocolate, will I die?
Love,
Rio
Rio,
Yes, Bad dog! Bad dog! Give me all the chocolate now! This is for your own good! This hurts you more than it hurts me.
Lime
The Village Idiot said...
uhhh...note to the editor...white chocolate is not a true chocolate...doesnt it have to contain ground up cocoa bean?
VI,
Very good! I was about to note that myself in this post. White chocolate is ONLY acceptable as a garnish or a decorating embellishment such as delicate white stripes atop a decadent dark chocolate truffle....something that visually contrasts with the dark, rich brown color and which subtly offers a slight textural and taste differentiation upon the tongue.......um...er...excuse me....I need a moment to myself.
Lime
bsoholic said...
Dear Lime,
I uh, er have this uh friend who loves chocolate but it makes him break out in pimples sometimes. What should he do about it?
BS,
Scientific studies have shown there is ZERO correlation between chocolate and acne. However, you are under no compulsion to tell your friend this. In fact, I recommend you encourage your friend to expunge his or her house of all chocolate for his/her own good. Then you can split the stash with me.
Lime
barefoot_mistress said...
Dear Lime,
Uh yes, where's the chocolate? I came here for the free samples.
Bare,
Free samples? Who said anything about free samples? Do I look like Willy Wonka?? I'm just the answer lady.
Lime
snavylyn said...
I have a confession to make:
Chocolate - take it or leave it.
Snavy,
I dunno what exactly that means. Are you saying you love the stuff or that you are indifferent? If you are indifferent then crimony, woman........gimme yer chocolate now!
Lime
posted by lime at
1/23/2006 05:41:00 PM
8 Comments:
ROTFLMAO......I think we've got a new weekly column here....Ask Lime....all chocolate qs all the time!
lol!
Thanks for the great advice lime, I'll be sure to tell my uh um friend. ;)
Does it mean that I am kinky that now you made wonder how a lime tastes with chocolate?
bare, what's the pay like for a weekly columnist?
bs, anytime!
logo, not kinky, a little strange but not kinky
Lime,
The pay really sucks but you would be doing us all a great service!
Lime, you should check out the 5th. I've got a breakfast that you'd die for! Ha!
And I'm not sharing..
Yeah Snavy, send me some chocolate too if you don't like it. ;)
I had a sugar-free Reeses Peanut Buttercup and I liked it. Was that wrong?
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