Its been ages since I had a good freak on the bus but, yesterday I had a winner.
The last good freak I had was the drunk wannabe drummer. Yesterday I had the privilege of sitting next to the re-incarnation of James Dean.
I knew I was in trouble when I got on the bus for the ride home. The only seat left was next to this guy holding a picture of the princes...William and Harry. Now I should have known better, one empty seat, a guy holding a pic of the royal princes. The up side, he didn't stink, the down side? He started talking to the picture when I sat down.
This next part will be me, typing the one sided conversation I got to hear:
These people on this bus are so stuck up and into themselves, not like you two. Look at them, so mature and grown up. It was the ..Mountbatten, Lord Moutbatten, no, the Windsors. Queen Elizabeth was the social climber of the century, she has what, like 8 billion dollars and I don't have a penny. Worst fu*king day of my life, wallet stolen. Those damn Windsors.(At this point I wanted to ask him about the House of Hanover and the degenerative genes of the likes of the Kings George).
(He then proceeds to tell the picture this) Know what I am going to do tomorrow? I am going to make a sign, a cardboard sign. No, mmm, yeah, I am not ashamed. The sign will say. I am James Dean, re-incarnated. I started the Pepsi Generation with a Commercial. I am going to sit in front of the US Attorney's office with my sign. IM JAMES DEAN Damnit. I write letters to Elizabeth Taylor telling her I am back. Where would America be without James Dean and Rebel Without A Cause. No one on this bus was ever thirteen, their inner child is dead. Ben Franklin believed in re-incarnation and he was the first secretary of the treasury. I started the Pepsi generation now, Im broke. But thats ok, Im priceless, not like all these stuck up people on the bus. James Dean re-incarnated....Im an actor...its ok, I can tone it down.
There was more of the same kind of babbling, for the entire trip, and I got to sit right next to it. If I was not afraid of being stabbed with a dirty pen, I would have asked him what it was like to drive a Porsche 550 Spider and what was the last thing that went through his mind during the crash...maybe next time
May your day be James Dean re-incarnated free
